Surviving Report Cards

After viewing the written account of your child's progress or realizing there are recent, school-related problems, you may need to schedule a parent-teacher conference. This event in itself can be cause to reach for the Alka-Seltzer. Our own egos as parents are often wrapped up with our child's success or failure in school. Possible criticism of our child -- when we secretly seek reassurance that we're doing an OK job, and so is little Sara or Jimmy -- can make an anticipated conference more stressful.

As I prepare for this event myself, I've researched materials and talked to Poudre R-1 elementary teachers, Charene Summers and Chris Gonzales. Here are tips for a less-stressful, parent-teacher conference.

Tips For A Successful Parent-Teacher Conference

• View the conference as a working partnership process with the teacher. Parental involvement with a child's educational program is vital. A parent is a child's first teacher. Remember holding his hand, as he took those tentative, toddler steps? Be there for him now, as he walks the educational path.
• Clear communication between parents and teacher is essential. An honest approach from both parties will enable you to understand how your child is doing, address concerns, and come up with a plan of action. In some cases, you may want to include the child in the discussion. After all, he must take responsibility for improving his school work. Nothing can be accomplished without your child on the team.
• Be prepared. If possible, observe in the classroom before your scheduled appointment. Make a list of questions and concerns to discuss at the conference. Here are examples: How does my child get along with others? What behavior does my child exhibit in the classroom? Is my child working up to his full potential and grade level? What interests and special abilities does he demonstrate in class? In what areas is my child showing success or weakness? What is the policy on homework? What are the teacher's classroom expectations and educational approach? What can I do at home to help my child?
• Take with you the following information:
  • How the child feels about school
  • Reactions to homework assignments
  • Behavior problems exhibited at home
  • Health concerns or family changes
  • Observed developmental difficulties
  • Special interests and hobbies
  • Favorite and least favorite subjects.
• Analyze any problem with the teacher, and don't get emotional yourself or place blame. There may be underlying reasons for your child's school dilemma -- a health issue, family change, recent relocation, sibling or peer conflict, or developmental immaturity.
• Contribute ideas for creating an individual plan that can be used at home and school to remedy problems. You know your child best and can help develop an effective approach with measurable goals. Follow up with the teacher to determine progress in the designated, time frame.
• Some children respond to a reward-incentive system for improved work. Bright stickers on completed work, plus coupons for extra time with Mom or Dad, and a special outing can all be effective. Often, children may need to lose privileges that are valued, until improvement is apparent. Be prepared to say "No!" to extra activities for awhile, and live with the child's displeasure!
• At home with your child, put the plan in place. Organize a quiet study corner -- it can be a fun experience for the child to set up a desk with new supplies. Together develop a daily schedule for doing homework, practicing reading or working on motor skills. If your child's frustration overcomes his ability to complete a task, be ready to assist. And remember to praise progress, and honor agreed-upon rewards when goals are reached.

Return To Article Index Page